Port Costa Beach Livin

A few weeks ago some friends and I decided that a barbecue in Port Costa would be a good idea.  We packed up some food, a grill, and beer and proceeded to have an excellent time.

Shortly after Sara and I arrived the grill was fired up

The lovely Allison was the grill master.

 Grillin

This kayaker chose to set sail right next to us

"Is that my food?" Kyle asked, confused.

Welcome to my weird, yet tasty burger.

After lunch it was time for Mad Libs

"Person, place, or thing... person, place or thing... I'm gonna have to go with penis."

This puppy decided to join our barbecue

He was down for the party and cute as hell...

I can't blame him for leaving his master though, with crack like that I'd be trying to get away from my master too. Ass crack like this is never sexy, even on girls.

Meditation party. "It feels like I'm floating..."

"Can I like, have my dog back please?"

"Good luck lady.  Your dog is with us now."

The pup stopped halfway back to the lady's spot and took a rest.  He was old and couldn't walk very well

We walked down the beach and found this seaworthy vessel

These two pioneers were the first on it

The captains chart a course

"But first I need another beer!"

We gathered a crew...

Untied our ship...

Shoved off...

And were out to sea! 

 And the first thing we did on the water?  Obviously try to capsize it, duh.

We partied with a kayaker and this big ship.

We were like golden sailing gods!

After we finished our beers we brought her back to land.

We had had our fill of seafaring so we brought her in and roped her up.

Shortly after these kids followed our lead and tried their hands at seafaring.  We are great role models.

The kids loved us.

"I'm number one!"

J Gale's Boomer's Birthday Bash

Well, after months of promising Jesse I'd do it, I finally got his birthday blog up.  My friend Jesse had a birthday awhile ago and he decided he wanted to have it at boomers.  Shawn, Theron, Jesse, and myself met up at Jesse's house and we headed out to Boomers for go karts and mini golf.

We had a sweet looking team that day

We drove out there and enjoyed some undercover beverages in the parking lot before going in

"This Iron Man cup is going to be my main cup from now on"

"Sweet, dude."

 HAPPY MOTHA FUCKIN BIRTHDAY JESSE!

After a childhood of always being too short to ride the cool rides, Big Shawn shows the height requirement whats up.

Once we had bought our tickets, we made a B-Line for the go karts

Theron was hyped

MJ's child was there rocking the Thriller Jacket

We broke a good number of these.  

"Gentlemen, start your engines!"

"GO!"

The track was laid out for me

 Shawn was having a blast

"Don't you go bumping me, fucker"

"See, no bumping allowed.  These are not bumper cars."

"I'm going sooooooo faaaassssstttttt!"

 "There I go looking like an idiot again"

"Oh, Haiiiiiiiiii!"

Gale was bringing up the rear as usual

And then, just as fast as the fun began, it ended.

And we were back in the pit

After all that racing it was time to get some extremely overpriced shitty food at the surfs up cafe

"So, let me show you how to get free food..."  Theron, mid sentance before snatching these second hand chicken tenders.

After food, it was time for some doubles go kart action.  Theron needed some help strapping in.

"Alright, I guess you guys can like, go or something."

Time to bum out children!

This kid was not amused by our antics.

That's why we had to smoke him.

"Take my hand if you want to LIVE!"

"Hey, no horseplay..." This guy had lots of hand signals for us.

I paid no attention though, I was too busy looking for the next target.

The connection was made

 We switched up drivers and continued to upset the children.

You can't beat us fuckers.

Our antics earned us a stern talking to. 

"Oooopsie"

After all the fun we were told to slow down and return to the pit.

We brought the cars back and decided to give the Boomer's people a break.

We stopped off at the car for a smoke break and more undercover bevies.

We switched our game to mini golf and proceed to the window for balls

This child was looking stylish with a plastic chain that would have made even Flava Flav slightly envious.

Tee-time!

Shawn tees off on hole number two

Gale missed this one

No smokes on the course buddy!

I think he missed this one too.

Shawn carefully tallied the numbers up.  Theron won, but nobody cared.

Then we all ended up at this house for a joint birthday party/kegger.

It was sorta cold but Theron was keeping the fire going.

The mustachioed gentleman's club was meeting in the kitchen.

Double fisting is just what John does.

PDA! Caught in the act!

Flip cup time

The boot was poured and I was the the man in charge of bringing up the rear...

I had to warm up for drinking by jerking off invisible dicks.

"Chug, chug, chug, chug!"

PWNED!

Haaaaaaaappy birrrrrrrrrthdaaaaaaay dear duuuuuuude! Happy birthday to you.

And also happy birthday to you Gale!

:"Don't look now John, but you have a lurker behind you..."

WhatdidZhoudotoday.com will be updated... never?

Leah and Nikki got busy on the piano inside.  These ladies have skills.

You sure you wanna do that Leah?

These dudes passed out after inviting Matty and Don over for movie fun time.

So obviously they shoved popcorn in Leah's mouth while she was sleeping.  It was the only logical thing to do.  Happy birthday Jesse!